failure upon failure

So either my question was not relayed in the crystal clear manner in which I asked, or his response was not communicated correctly to me. Per my doctor today, they do not have u/s machines that have abdominal u/s things.

Just so the visit wasn’t a complete waste of time, he gave the trial transfer another shot. Do you think it worked?

He went ahead and called this my baseline, so I don’t go back again until after I’ve been on the Gonal-f for 3 days. I start on 3/14, appt with the tech on 3/17. Probably an appointment with him on 3/20.

At that appointment, he is going to get an earful. The communication didn’t break down on my end; it broke down somewhere in that office. Which, in turn, wasted my time and his.

He said he didn’t want me to be discouraged about this. That at least we know about it. That if we didn’t, that would have been disastrous because I would have ended up with a laparoscopy to put the embryos in my fallopian tubes.

I’m terrified that we aren’t out of the woods. There are so many things that have to go right with this cervix of mine – he has to be able to dilate it, it has to stay open, he has to be able to navigate it.

I told J tonight that under no circumstances is a laparoscopy to be performed to transfer embryos. None.

I have to let this go. I have to trust that these things will work out in the end. I will. Just not this moment.


~ by Larisa on March 11, 2006.

8 Responses to “failure upon failure”

  1. Oh, hon, I am so sorry. I can’t imagine how frustrating that had to be this afternoon.

  2. The way things sometimes get messed up in the office can be horrifying.

    What’s worse is that sometimes it is beyond our control.

    An earful indeed… they have it coming.

  3. Oh Mrs. Hope, I’m so sorry to hear that they still haven’t found away – at least to put you at ease. I don’t blame you for feeling incredibly frustrated and scared.

    I wish I understood why the RE was so confident it will all be fine – but I’m hopeful that he’ll be proven right.

    Good luck with starting the stims. Take care of yourself, now.

  4. I’m sorry that the trial transfer didn’t go well, again. What is his suggestion for what you do at transfer given this hasn’t worked yet? You might visit Amanda’s blog, I think she had some transfer problems but the last transfer went well – I think they changed the catheter or something. Anyway, it’s worth a check.

    Hoping that they can pull their finger out and fix this.

  5. Mrs. Hope, I am so sorry to read of your lows, I am in a similar situtation (which is why I fell upon your blog)…. all I can say is I hope to be reading a very very high soon.

    All the very best.

    Barren of Birmingham, England

  6. Mrs. Hope, I am very sorry you didn’t have a better day. If it’s not too personal, what exactly is the problem with your cervix? Is it angled or is the opening not big enough? I have a 90 degree angle and have had problems with several tests and my transfers. If the problems is an angle, I can share what helped with me. I don’t understand how your doctor doesn’t have an abdomial ultrasound, how does he know the embryo’s have been placed in the uterus and not in the tubes?

  7. How utterly frustrating!
    I’m so sorry.

    Why are you against a laparoscopy? Is it much more invasive than retrieval?

  8. Mrs. Hope,

    You’re in my thoughts.

    I am so incredibly sorry that you’re going through so much, and wish I could do something, anything to make this better.

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