31

Last year, I turned 27.

Again.

This year, I’m ready. This year, I’m turning 31. Four and a half years have passed (how can that be?) since my brother died. Over three and a half since we started trying to have a baby.

There was a lot of work in those years. A lot of loss. A lot of grief.

I sacrificed a lot, I cried a lot, I just made it through each day a lot.

I didn’t want those years. And I miss Sean every day. And I thank my lucky stars I’m not cycling anymore.

But I’m ready to own those years. They’re mine – all of them. Without them, I wouldn’t have BabyHope. There’s no path to her without those years.

This is the happiest birthday in a long time.

Today, I’m 31.

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~ by Larisa on February 21, 2008.

No Responses Yet to “31”

  1. Happy birthday, girl!

    The 21st is also my mom’s b-day and the 22nd is my hubby’s! Feb is a busy month! 🙂

  2. HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you! they keep saying 30 is the new 20. but what the hell does that mean anyway.

  3. Happy Birthday. I felt that way for my birthday too. For the first time in years it was a reason to celebrate. I hope you feel that way each birthday from now on!

  4. Happy Birthday!

  5. Happy Birthday! I hope it’s a great one. It’s good to be moving forward, but it never means your forget. I’m sorry about your brother.

  6. Happy Birthday! I’m sure this is the bestest birthday you’ve ever had now that you have your little angel.

  7. Happy 31st Birthday, Congratulations, it’s been a long road..I am glad you are going to enjoy it! =0)

    Cheryl

  8. Happy Birthday! Enjoy your beautiful daughter on your special day! And take lots of pictures 🙂

  9. happy birthday! i am so happy for you and your family. i have been reading your blog for awhile now and i really wanted to post and let you know you have another reader :0)

    i am glad this year you have much reason to celebrate! every birthday from now on will be special :0)

  10. Happy Happy Birthday!

  11. Happy Birthday!!! Sounds like you have given yourself a wonderful gift.

  12. Happy Birthday Mrs. Hope. Hope you’ve had a wonderful day. You’ve earned it 🙂

  13. Happy Birthday!

  14. Happy Birthday! For what it’s worth my 30’s have been the best 3 years of my life, so far.fr

  15. Happy Birthday, Mrs. Hope.

  16. I just read through the last year or so of your entries – congratulations! Your daughter is gorgeous! What a journey to get to this point.

    Honestly though, my real reason for commenting is – I LOVE your crib bedding! Can you say where it’s from, pretty please?? I would really appreciate it. Not that I have a crib to put it in yet, but maybe soon…

    Oh, and – happy belated birthday!

    Tracy

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