I re-read that last post, and I can’t even believe I wrote it.  I was so exhausted.  There’s so much I didn’t (and probably won’t ever) write.  I’ve replayed the whole sequence of events in my head, and I don’t think anyone really could have done anything differently.

No one expected me to bleed like that – you’re not supposed to.  It was the third major bleeding episode I’d had with that pregnancy, so I think everyone, myself included, was thinking it was more of the same.  I probably should have gone straight to the emergency room, but I don’t know how that would have played out, either.  And again, while I knew something was very wrong, I didn’t understand how wrong.

That leads me to the boomerang part.  I’m back in the hospital.  I was released yesterday, but spiked a fever at home.  It didn’t quickly come down with Motrin, so I earned myself a re-admission for IV antibiotics.  There are some other lab values that are a little “off”, including my white count.  So I’m here until (hopefully just) tomorrow.  They’ll continue to run the meds and do labs in the morning.  I think if they come back okay, I’ll be free to go.

~ by Larisa on March 2, 2010.

19 Responses to “boomerang”

  1. OMG…WTF?!?! I am SO, SO sorry you’re having to go through all of this. As if all you’d been through already weren’t enough, now you had to go back to the hospital. I’m sure you’re not feeling this way, but reading your post, you sound really good. I hope at least a bit of that is not me reading into it. Take good, good care of yourself and know that there are so many of us out here in “cyberland” who are hoping and praying you get to feeling better, all the way around, soon.

  2. So, so devastating. It sounds very unnerving to get out of hospital only to have to go back. I hope those labs come back all right.

  3. oh no. this really is a nightmare.
    i hope your labs come back fine and that you are home soon.

  4. Well hell, you cannot get a break. I am so sorry you’re back in the hospital, but glad they’re responding quickly with the IV stuff. PLEASE let me know how I can help, if there’s anything you need. You know I don’t work on Fridays….I just want to wrap my arms around you and make it all better and dammit if it were just that easy. Sending you a virtual hug.

  5. Where the hell if your break? 😦

    Hang in there. (((Hugs)))

    We’re thinking/praying for/about you.

  6. Your last couple posts totally took my breath away. The scary surprises our bodies are capable of seem to be endless. I am so sorry you’re going through this, and I hope you are home and healing soon.

  7. This made me cry. I am so sorry!!!!!!!!!!!!! I lost a set of twins at 15 weeks. I bled much like you did for three weeks before we lost them. If you need to talk come and visit my blog.

  8. So so sorry for your loss. I’m thinking of you.


  9. I know you are wanting to home so, so badly, but with everything that’s happened…I guess I just don’t trust medical people and hospitals (ironic, I know). Please be very careful with yourself and continue to advocate for yourself. If you feel you need an extra day, for antibiotics, fluids, whatever, tell them! Throw in some vitamins in that IV bag while they’re at it. This is just a nightmare that no one should ever have to go through. Hoping the treatment is working and that you are feeling better…it’s gonna be a long road. Sending you good thoughts.

  10. I have no other words… I am so, so sorry.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you.

  11. I just caught up with this ugly turn. I feel so sad. I also feel sick and angry. What an awful nightmare. I hope you get well quickly and can go home to snuggle with beautiful Baby Hope soon.

  12. I am so sorry… it just isnt right or fair….

  13. Sending you healing vibes, hon. Been thinking of you nonstop.


  14. I’m so sorry about the loss of your baby. I hope you have no further complications and be back hope soon.

  15. I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope you are able to be out of the hospital soon and begin healing. ((HUGS))

  16. My soul cries tears for you. I hope that your blood work will be normal, and you can go home to privately grieve and do whatever it is you feel is necessary to deal with the pain. I also hope the doctors can eventually give you a good explanation as to why this happened. The worst thing about infertility and losses is the pain and the unknown factors which we have no control over. May you be surrounded by those who let you vent, and those who hold a peaceful, compassionate protective ring around you.

  17. Damn. How horrible. Hang in there. Big hugs…

  18. Here from LFCA: I’m so very, very sorry. Peace to you.

  19. Here from LFCA: I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope the physical healing goes quickly and smoothly so the emotional healing can begin for you. ((hugs))

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